I am answering the question again.
If you really knew me, you’d know that I love you. You’d know I think about you a lot, and care about you. You’d see a true partner, someone who wants for you what you want for yourself.
You’d know that sometimes I laugh so hard that I can’t breathe…that I access my inner 10-year-old on a regular basis…that sometimes I just can’t contain my joy and it comes out in all sorts of mischievous ways.
You’d know that I practice what I preach, that I set boundaries like a boss, that I say “no” unless it’s a HELL YES!
And sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I stumble and don’t get it right.
You’d know that when I feel the funk, I see it as a sign of strength and resilience – something to be proud of – not as a sign that I am wallowing. You’d know that as crappy as it feels in the moment, I am not in a rush to NOT feel that way. You’d know that I don’t act on those feelings, I just let myself feel them.
You’d know that feeling this way is part of a rich, full, and feminine life, not something to hide, be ashamed of, resist, or medicate.
You’d want to learn how to do that, too, because as much as we all love to laugh and be silly, unless you’re willing to go to the dark side, you’ll never be fully in the light. You’d know I embrace the both/and of life. You’d see someone who wouldn’t trade ANY of it for ANYTHING.
You’d see someone who sees the wisdom of the ages in all of her emotions.
P.S. My friend Jeanne Andrus (The Menopause Guru) shared this bit of wisdom with me from Louann Brizendine, M.D.’s book “The Female Brain”:
“Some of my patients came to me feeling so jerked around by their hormones that they couldn’t work or speak to anyone because they’d either burst into tears or bite someone’s head off. Most weeks of the month they were engaged, intelligent, productive, and optimistic, but a mere shift in the hormonal flood to their brains on certain days left them feeling that the future looked bleak, and that they hated themselves and their lives. These thoughts felt real and solid, and these women acted on them as though they were reality and would last forever –even thought they arose solely from hormonal shifts in their brains.”
Jeanne says the hormonal shifts in perimenopause can be at least as dramatic, and worse, may not be as fleeting as those of the “normal” cycle.