In college, my writing professor suggested that my prose were Proustian. I am embarrassed to admit that, at the time, I had no real idea who Proust was, other than “a writer.” To this day, I have not read Proust.

But who cares? Here are my answers to Vanity Fair’s version of the Proust Questionnaire.

What is your idea of perfect happiness? “Happiness is the emotional reaction to the performing of actions that bring you closer to what or where you want to be.” ~ Commander Johnson

What is your greatest fear? Irrelevance. Actually, I don’t know if that’s my greatest fear, but right now it is.

Which historical figure do you most identify with? I don’t.

What is the trait you most deplore in yourself? A tendency towards “all or nothing” thinking.

What is the trait you most deplore in others? Hypocrisy/martyrdom.

What is your greatest extravagance? The freedom to pursue my passion and a flexible schedule.

What is your favorite journey? The one I’m on. My life.

What do you dislike most about your appearance? Right this minute? My bloated abdomen. Although I am really trying to accept it so I can view it more objectively and not through a lens of desperation.

What words or phrases do you most overuse? I don’t know. (That’s not the phase I most overuse…I really don’t know. You tell me.)

What is your greatest regret? Having rushed certain things/processes that should not have been rushed.

Who or what is the greatest love(s) of your life? My husband.

When or where were you happiest? See the answer to the question above, “What is your idea of perfect happiness?” and add to that, I am happy at home (and home is not a specific place, it’s a feeling).

What talent would you most like to have? I would like to be able to sing so as to give others goose bumps. In a good way.

What do you consider your greatest achievement? My marriage.

If you were to die and come back as a person or thing, what would it be? A beloved and spoiled house cat.

What is your most treasured possession? My confidence.

What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery? Bitterness/resentment.

Where would you like to live? Somewhere warmer, sunnier, and with longer daylight hours year-round. Preferably by an ocean.

What is your favorite occupation? Writing.

What is your most marked characteristic? Transparency and/or the ability to relate.

What is the quality you most like in a man? Timness. This is a quality my sister came up with to describe my husband.

What do you most value in your friends? Transparency and/or the ability to relate.

Who are your favorite writers? John Irving, Wally Lamb, Elizabeth Gilbert, Ayn Rand, James Michener…

Who is your favorite hero in fiction? Dolores Price from She’s Come Undone

Who are your heroes in real life? Pretty much everyone I know.

What are your favorite names? I don’t have any.

What is it that you most dislike? Conflict. Liver and lima beans.

How would you like to die? Fearlessly, but also quickly and with no warning. Is that a contradiction?

What is your motto? I have three: 1) Be for, not against. 2) It’s not mine to fix. 3) Practice, don’t preach.