How do you set boundaries with someone who has dementia?

by KCLAnderson | Feb 22, 2019 | Boundaries, Dementia, Generational patterns, Grandma, Mother-daughter relationship, Relationships

(Do you feel emotionally exhausted by your mother? Setting boundaries is the solution. Click here to sign up for my 1-day online boundaries workshop.) Question from a reader: My mother, who was and is mentally ill, now also has dementia and forgets what I say, even...

She doesn’t have to die in order for you to feel better

by KCLAnderson | Feb 1, 2019 | Awareness, Empowerment, Mother-daughter relationship, Relationships, The Wisdom of Others

I received an interesting response to last week’s column (Grieving a mother who is still alive) and wanted to share it because it occurred to me that I AM NOT DOING MY JOB if anyone who reads my books/columns/newsletter believes that they have to wait for...

Grieving a mother who is still alive

by KCLAnderson | Jan 25, 2019 | Awareness, Emotions, grief, Mother-daughter relationship, Relationships, The Wisdom of Others

Question from a reader… A friend recently lost her mother and I think it sparked a grieving process in me. It’s as if my own mother was dead, the mother I always wished I had. My mother is, of course, alive and well and we continue to have a very difficult...

An open letter to your mother

by KCLAnderson | Dec 21, 2018 | Boundaries, Empowerment, Mother-daughter relationship, Re-mothering, Relationships, Self-Acceptance

Imagine me reading this to your mother…or, if you’d like to hear me read it, click here. Also, your mother may be mentally ill, addicted, and/or have a personality disorder that prevents her from having the empathy and ability to hear and receive this...

I can because I already have

by KCLAnderson | Jul 26, 2018 | Awareness, Emotions, Re-mothering, Relationships, Self-Acceptance, Uncategorized

[This post falls into the categories of “self acceptance through storytelling” and “examining the ways in which we are like our mothers.” I have written a time or two about how when we resist being like our mothers there may be unintended...

“There’s no need to feel _____________” and other lies we’ve been told

by KCLAnderson | Jul 13, 2018 | Awareness, Emotions, Feminism, Generational patterns, Mother-daughter relationship, narcissism, Relationships, The Wisdom of Others, Trauma

Just now I was reading a novel in which one character (let’s call her Ann) says to another (let’s call her Zoe), “There’s no need to feel embarrassed.” Ostensibly, Ann wants Zoe to feel better. She doesn’t want Zoe to feel...